It’s much easier to lie and reassure ourselves that in amorous relations, especially in deeply patriarchal settings such as ours, age doesn’t matter. Deep down, we know it does, but in a bid not to appear old-fashioned, we try to gloss over it.
If it truly doesn’t, then how come most men feel a bit edgy and inadequate when they ASSUME a lady they are dealing with is much older than they are, especially if the said lady has a larger body size and frame in comparison to the man? And how come such edginess disappears immediately the man gets to know she’s only bigger in body size but small in age?
Also, how come most women will try to downplay their demeanor and personality if their body size gives the impression they are way older than the man, only for them to act ‘normal’ when it becomes clear the man is actually way older than they are?
See the subtle age dynamics that gets played each time we meet someone newly?
I once dated an older lady, and even though I tried to act all normal on the outside, there were always times when I wonder if what she said or did, especially in a fit of anger, could have been influenced by the fact that she feels I am a ‘small boy’.
These thoughts will always come and go, fake it as you want. And if she naturally has a domineering personality, over time, you start feeling emasculated.
Now, while this is an obvious truth, the issue is that it is now in our place in relationships not to allow it affect how we deal with the other person in the relationship. And that’s where mutual understanding and maturity comes into play. If you are both understanding and mature, you will come to agree that age, indeed, is just a number.
Where both of these attributes are lacking, however, it’s only a matter of time before things unravel, and then the once easy-going man starts seeing the woman as a cougar, while his family goes up in arms against “that old cargo that has bewitched our son with kobnomi”.